It's back, this darkness
even on this bright day
this pain that tells me
that it doesn't matter
this willingness to let go
this sense to hang on
just fall they say, just fall
and be free, screw the pills
just release, guarded
is what he said, and now
I believe him, my muscles
tense, my lover at home
without my touch, without
my lips, without my tongue
doing that thing that it does